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Home » Jokes: Get Your Funny On! » I tried to submit a patent for a gold-plated, Bluetooth-ready butt plug, but Steve Jobs beat me to it.

I tried to submit a patent for a gold-plated, Bluetooth-ready butt plug, but Steve Jobs beat me to it.

September 15, 2018No comments

It turns out he's already making overpriced toys for assholes!

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Italy's medical workers: 'We became heroes but they've already forgotten us'
Jasamrit Fashions
Jasamrit Premises
JEE exams: 'Conducting these exams will be a giant mistake'
Jejoen Bontinck: I escaped a life of Islamic terror - now I rap about it
Jeyaraj and Benicks: Why was a viral video on custodial deaths taken down?
Joe Biden assault claim: What does 'believe women' mean now?
Joe Biden: Where does the US presidential hopeful stand on key issues?
Joe Montana: American football legend saves grandchild from kidnapping attempt
Jogging when you're black - the calculations you have to make
John Bolton: Criminal inquiry opened into explosive memoir
John Bolton: Trump administration sues to block book
John Nzenze: The founder of 'Africa's best band'
Jokes By Kids
Jokes of the day
Jokes: Get Your Funny On!
Jon Stewart: 'There will always be room for political satire'
Juneteenth: 'This is such a change in history'
Kaesong liaison office: What does North Korea want?
Kamala
Kangana Ranaut: The star taking on Bollywood
Kashmir and Modi's friend all on ballot in US election
Kashmir's open-air classes offer stunning solution to lockdown
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Katie Mack: 'Knowing how the universe will end is freeing'
Kazuyoshi Miura: A professional footballer at 53 - how he does it
Keedron Bryant: Warner Records signs black protest singer
Kenya: Police brutality in the battle against coronavirus in Mathare
killing 21
King of Staten Island: 'There's comedy in the most difficult situations'
Kylie Moore-Gilbert: Lecturer jailed in Iran 'moved to remote prison'
Lagos Inferno: The blast that destroyed a Nigerian girl's school
Lampedusa: Migrant with coronavirus gives birth in helicopter
Last of Us Part II: Is this the most accessible game ever?
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Lessons from Asia's new virus spikes
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Letter from Africa: Behind Ghana and Nigeria's love-hate affair
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LGBT: Covid-19 forced me back home where I'm 'unwanted'
Li Wenliang: 'Wailing Wall' for China's virus whistleblowing doctor
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Microsoft Flight Simulator: The entire world in a game
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Moments of joy between mothers and children in prison
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National People's Congress: China's parliament meets for post-virus show of strength
Navajo Nation: The people battling America's worst coronavirus outbreak
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Netanyahu focus of Israeli protests against 'the king'
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Nile dam dispute: Ethiopia
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North Korea propaganda: New faces but old messages
now I design biking gear'
NYPD officer charged with spying for China
NYT
obstacle courses and hate mail
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Olof Palme: Who killed Sweden's prime minister?
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One family
Oneindia.in - thatsHindi
Onions
Online child abuse rising during lockdown warn police
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Pakistan news
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Paris police step up anti-noise patrols
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Philippines: Environmentalists criticise artificial beach in Manila Bay
Photography award winners show the fragility and beauty of mangrove forests
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please make men share housework!'
PM Morrison says
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Poland election: The fight for LGBT rights
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Portraits of Humanity shortlist revealed
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poverty and crime?
Prague Catholic statue torn down by mob rises again
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Pre-colonial communities’ history of gender fluidity
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racism and Star Wars
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Recovering from Covid-19: 'I can't get the images out of my head'
red wine': The meaning of African election symbols
Reeta Chakrabarti: My Forgotten Army family ties
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Republicans introduce $1tn pandemic recovery plan
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Rethink: Pope Francis warns poor have become part of landscape
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Rising water levels in Kenya's Great Rift Valley threaten jobs and wildlife
Rival powers jockey for the lead in hypersonic aircraft
Robert Fuller: Hanging death of black man ruled suicide
Robots go their own way deep in the ocean
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Rowley Shoals: The bleached Australian reef and a Covid challenge
Russia and Turkey risk turning Libya into another Syria
Russia holds World War Two victory parade in coronavirus shadow
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Russian cleaner sweeps to power in surprise village vote
Russian parade defies pandemic as Putin stages power bid
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Safaris go virtual as coronavirus hits tourism
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Saudi Arabia: Just how deep are its troubles?
Saving India's traditional rice varieties
Saving one of the world's rarest antelope
Say Her Name: 'Black women are killed by police too'
say young activists
says 'I think I'm doing very well'
says Italian grandad
says official
says Russian spy chief
Scientists create a microscopic robot that ‘walks’
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Searching for the lost dogs of the Beirut blast
Seaweed: The food and fuel of the future?
Serbia election: Vote in EU candidate state scorned as sham
Shattering Korea’s cement ceiling
Ship with no crew to sail across the Atlantic
Should I get a flu jab this winter?
Siberia climate change: Behind the scenes reporting from Yakutia
Siberia landscape scarred by climate change
Singapore election: Does the political shake-up change anything?
Singapore rolls out Covid tracing tokens
Singapore: The mums asking suicidal teens to 'please stay'
six months after pandemic declared
Sky is the limit for Pakistan's metal artist
social media is changing
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Somalia's coronavirus khat bans leaves chewers in a stew
South Africa: Is 'black tax' help or a burden?
South Africa’s battle to protect women against violence
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SpaceX: Nasa crew describe rumbles and jolts of return to Earth
Spain quarantine rules: The businesses fearing for their futures
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Trump-aged Covid survivors on the president and the pandemic
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twice'
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What happened when a city disbanded its police force
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When India hosted China amid 1962 war tension
WHO says
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Wildlife scientists examine the great 'human pause'
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Wilson Jerman: Ex-White House butler dies of coronavirus
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world news
World's deepest octopus captured on camera
World's largest all-electric plane takes flight
Wounds of Dutch history expose deep racial divide
WW2: The nun who saved my life
Yemen war: Tortured for supporting the 'wrong' side
Young skater goes viral performing at Black Lives Matter Plaza
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Zimbabwe's Cook Off: How an $8
Zuckerberg hits back at Facebook boycott

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