A very young James went to his grandfather and asked for a tricycle.
Grandfather asked, "Jimmy, can your weewee reach all the way to your butthole?"
"Well, no Grandpa, it can't", Jimmy replied sheepishly.
Grandpa said to come back and talk when it could.
A few years later, James came to his grandfather again.
"Grandpa Tom, I'm a big boy now and I've been very good and have been doing all my chores like I'm supposed to, without even being asked. Can I have a bicycle?"
"Well, Jimmy my boy, is your schlong of length enough now to reach your filthy poop chute?"
"I guess it still isn't, Grandpa Tom."
"Then bugger off, boy."
James returned in a few more years, on graduation day, with another request.
Gramps, "I've studied and worked hard, made good grades, and graduated at the top of my class. I think a car for graduation would be really great."
"Well, son, you should know the question by now. Is your wee tallywhacker able to make the long journey to your old chocolate starfish?"
To this question, James beamed, "Why yes, Grandpa Tom, it sure can now!"
"Goood, good! Then go fuck yourself."
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